Who Wrote This Dribble?!

I’ve said before (probably more than once) how much I love delving into the minds of writers. One topic I enjoy discussing is the bad lines we write that, hopefully, never see the light of day.

We all have these horrible lines that somehow creep their way into our manuscripts and make us scratch our heads. We look back at them and wonder just what the hell we were thinking when we wrote them. Sometimes, it’s a line the writer thinks is pure gold when first written, but in hindsight wreaks of old shoes and musty closets, sometimes making no sense at all. Thankfully, we can delete anything we want, but they shouldn’t be there to begin with.

How do they get there? Does someone (or something) take over my fingers and type these lines? Because, a) I don’t remember writing them sometimes, though they are there, and b) I don’t write this crappy………..Really, I don’t.

I firmly believe when we are in our zone, on a roll and writing away like it’s nobody’s business, we have no clue what we say for the most part. We’re not in control at that point. When we’re in that zone, the story is guiding us or the character(s) are showing us the path that they follow.

I’m taking one for the team and sharing a couple tidbits of stupidity that have come from me recently. Please don’t think any less of me after you read them. I assure you, neither of them are in the manuscripts anymore.

Caught this little nugget of excellence while I was editing one of the Erotica stories…

The color on my face deepens to a deep red.

— Really? …. I mean, really? Who wrote that shit?

Check this lovely bit of scrawl out. Four -ly words in two sentences…

Slowly, he comes toward me, his hands out in front of him slightly. He haltingly and gently places his hands on my arms.

 — Just take the pen and laptop away from me now. I should NOT be allowed to write again. Ever.

I about stabbed myself in the eye with my pen when I reread that last line during edits. I’m not going to lie…I almost cried.

Bad writer! Bad!

This, dear readers, is why we do endless edits on our manuscripts. Without the edits and rewrites, lines like the ones above would remain

…and people would probably point and laugh at us for trying to publish that trash.

Don’t be shy, share some of your worst lines. I won’t judge, Scout’s honor!